Obama Confused by Mixed Signals from Congress

WASHINGTON—In a press conference this Monday, President Obama admitted to being deeply confused by the mixed signals he was receiving from Congress during the most recent negotiations surrounding immigration reform.
“First they try to sue me for doing things my way, then they tell me to work things out on my own. It’s like we’re not even speaking the same language anymore,” said the president.
Continuing on in a rare moment of visible frustration, the president remarked, “I could have done a lot better, you know. You think Angela Merkel has to deal with this bullshit?”
After an extended pause, the president regained his usual composure, stating that he “just wanted to go back to the way things used to be.” “I miss my favorite golf partner,” said the president, referring to current Speaker of the House, John Boehner.
Responding to a reporter’s question, Obama commented that he thinks the August recess will be good for the nation, giving both him and Congress “time to work out things on their own.”
The president ended the press conference with a slightly off-key rendition of Fleetwood Mac’s single, “Go Your Own Way.”

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