Obama Confused by Mixed Signals from Congress

WASHINGTON—In a press conference this Monday, President Obama admitted to being deeply confused by the mixed signals he was receiving from Congress during the most recent negotiations surrounding immigration reform. “First they try to sue me for doing things my way, then they tell me to work things out on my own. It’s like we’re … Read more

Romney Get Your Gun

With what feels like a new mass shooting occurring every few weeks, Americans all along the political spectrum are trying to tease out a solution to our homicide epidemic. Both sides—those who believe stricter gun control laws will decrease the incidence of gun-related homicide, and those who believe looser regulations will—have cited studies and created … Read more

Satan Rejected from Harvard, Plots Revenge with Black Mass

In a press release that is quickly garnering media attention, the Cultural Studies Group at the Harvard Extension School revealed their underlying reasons for orchestrating a black mass this coming Monday: the group is seeking retribution for what it regards as Satan’s unjust rejection from Harvard College earlier this spring. “We were 100% certain he … Read more

The Real Reason Erdogan Blocked YouTube

In an article I wrote a few days ago, I mentioned that Turkey’s Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan had blocked Twitter and YouTube. I sent my article to a friend from Turkey, and he sent me a video of one of the Prime Minister’s speeches on March 27. According to him, this video was the … Read more

Obama’s Year in Review

10. The 5-Second Rule is Now the Only Legitimate Form of Health Insurance 9. PRISM Has Become Self-Aware 8. Edward Snowden Lands Safely on Mars 7. The U.S. and Overly-Attached NSA Decide to Separate 6. U.S. Drones Stationed in the Middle East Break Out in Civil War 5. Healthcare.gov Literally Takes the Internet Down with … Read more

Syria’s Polio Outbreaks are Assad’s Fault

Too often we are caught up in the geopolitics of the Syrian conflict: which countries are supporting whom, how do we navigate the complex sub-groups constituting the “rebels,” how concerned should we be with al-Qaeda and ISIS gaining influence, why did Geneva II fail to produce any significant results, and so forth. We forget that … Read more

President Obama to Visit Harvard Square

Barack Obama will be visiting Harvard Square on the afternoon of Wednesday, March 5th to attend a “DNC Roundtable.” The event is being hosted by a DNC supporter, likely in or near the Charles Hotel between 3pm and 6pm, based on road closures and the limited closure of the Charles Hotel parking garage. The event’s … Read more

Ukraine Boils Over: Media Diet

The Ukraine is boiling over. The Maidan, the Tahrir Square of Kiev, is a war zone. The battle lines are constantly being redrawn, and the conflict has already spread beyond the capital, even into traditionally Russian strongholds. But you might miss the rapidly unfolding human drama if you follow only American news sources. Here’s your … Read more

New Dean Rakesh Khurana: In His Own Words

In a letter to students Wednesday afternoon, Interim Dean of Harvard College Donald Pfister announced the selection of a new dean, Professor Rakesh Khurana, currently Co-Master of Cabot House. Professor Khurana will start as dean on July 1. The Harvard Gazette has an official announcement of the news with an extensive write-up of Khurana’s background. His … Read more